A VIRGIN bride allegedly attacked her footballer husband on their honeymoon because of his "anaconda" penis.
She branded it a "hairy, scary cucumber" far too big for her to handle.
And she feared it would destroy her v@g!na when the footballer tried to score with her for the first time.
Groom Mnombo Madyibi – nicknamed Anaconda by pals – ended up with a bandaged head after his new wife bashed him with a wine bottle, he said.
The frustrated 32-year-old revealed: "All was well and she enjoyed the foreplay.
"But all hell broke loose the moment I took off my underwear.
"My wife said she wanted a 4-5 inside her, not an anaconda.
"When I tried to penetrate her, she bit my ear before squeezing my balls.
"Before I knew it, she knocked me over with a bottle of wine before attempting to suffocate me with a red and white teddy bear I'd bought her as a gift."
Mnombo said his screams woke up other guests in their B and B in the small coastal town of Coffee Bay, South Africa.
He added: "We took different buses back home.
"I don't want to lay charges against my new wife. I love her.
"I think she's angry because I could only afford a cheaper honeymoon instead of the one she wished for in Zanzibar."
He said he met his unnamed wife at church last year and she told him she wanted to abstain from sex until they were married.
Mnombo, who earned his Anaconda nickname after his soccer mates saw his tackle in changing rooms, added: "I've only heard of pen!s enlargement and not pen!s shrinking."
His missus claimed she never hit or tried to suffocate Mnombo.
She said: "He has a big pen!s – long like a cucumber and hairy and scary like a bush.
"I only slapped him on the cheek."
The couple have agreed to get counselling and not involve the police.
Also Read: Venda man wants his pen!s to be recognized as the world’s longest
Also Read: Venda man wants his pen!s to be recognized as the world’s longest
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